Category Archives: Just for Fun

Outfit Post Outtakes

Get excited, another installment of everyone’s favorite post is here. Behold more outtakes for your laughing pleasure:

outfit outtakeThis photo might seem unassuming at first, but look closely. You will spot a trio of photo bombers in the background striking poses. This is why I usually avoid shooting in public places at all costs. But when the light is this good, you gotta do what you gotta do.

outfit outtake 5Sometimes taking artsy photos in nature works — other times you end up looking like you’re trapped in a picture of a rare sighting of Big Foot, where you are Big Foot.

outfit outtake 4“Let me just sit down in these flowers for a second and pick my nose.”

outfit outtake 3Bird poo? Dandruff? The world may never know.

outtake 5It wouldn’t be a proper outtakes rundown if there wasn’t a photo of me judging something harshly. I even had to remove my sunglasses for this judgement. The world needed to see the full force of the disapproval on my face.

outfit outtake 2And last but not least, a photo of me making the most horrible face in the world. LOL! I actually can’t look at this photo without laughing out loud. Also, what am I doing with my arms?!

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5 Years in NYC

This month marks my fifth year living in NYC, which is totally crazy to me. I always thought I would live in New York for one or two years and then head on back to VA where I would live with my parents forever and cater to them in their old age. Now I can’t imagine leaving this crazy town. I mean, where would I get my hair done?!

Fun facts: I haven’t driven a car since I got here. I will never own a home as long as I live in the city. I rarely grocery shop — mostly I order take-out because my kitchen is too small to cook anything worthwhile. I walk fast. I have to pay to do my laundry. I never have to worry about a designated driver on Saturday night. I don’t smile at strangers. I know the best froyo in town is on the 7th floor of Bloomingdale’s. I likely spend more to rent my apartment than you do on your mortgage. Living in New York is like living in whole new world. Sometimes I hate it, but mostly I love it.

Here’s what I’ve learned so far.

Screen shot 2014-06-03 at 8.54.54 PM

Everyone is smarter than you: You might think you’re good at something, but you quickly find out that you’re mediocre at best when you move to the city. I think the phrase If I can make it there, I’ll make it anywhere, it’s up to you, New York, New York is basically a nice way of saying that this town is crawling with people who are better than you so sit down and shut up, ya big dummy. I firmly believe that you are only as smart as the people you regularly hang out with. So if you want to be a smarter person, come work in New York City.

You will become a bonafide food snob: I may have witnessed my husband, who is probably the chillest, nicest person ever, visibly cringe at the mention of TGI Fridays. When even your sketchy local bodega makes the best sandwich you’ve ever tasted, it is nearly impossible to go back to chains. My heart was broken when I recently went to Olive Garden (an old fave) and truly hated it. I could have cried. Curse you, delicious Eataly food!

People sometimes say passive aggressive (rude) things about living in NYC:

Stranger that you just met at a cookout in your hometown: “Oh, you live in New York?! Oh I could NEVER live there! It’s too crowded and loud and dirty and horrible.”

Now these haters people do have a valid point about the dirty and horrible part. Once you nearly step in human excrement in the park, a tiny part of you is never the same. But I also know that these people aren’t talking about human excrement, they are talking about Times Square — the only place they went when they visited NYC in the 11th grade. The memory of sweaty, doughy tourists packed together in a shimmering, blinking square mile of hell traumatized them for life. Don’t worry, I have a similar aversion to Times Square. It is the worst. The rest of the city is pretty great, though, so stop hatin’.

You will be poor: I am convinced that there is a secret ‘leaving fee’ in this town. The leaving fee states that the moment you step out of your apartment $50 is deducted from your bank account. This fee must exist otherwise I truly don’t know where all the money goes.

You will think about getting a dog, but then you’ll decide against it: I can not tell you how many times I have had this conversation:

Friend: Aww, look at that dog. Ugh, I want a dog!

Me: Me too!

Friend: I should get a dog.

Me: You totally should! Then I can play with it. My building doesn’t allow dogs (insert sad face).

Friend: Yea, but I work so much and the dog will be alone all day. Plus, dog walkers are so expensive. My neighbor has to pay one to come to her apartment twice a day!

Me: Totally. I guess it wouldn’t really be fair to the dog.

Friend: No, I guess not.

*scene*

Seriously, I have this exact conversation every month. It never gets less sad.

Brunch: Brunch is a very important part of a New York dwellers life. Without brunch you would die. This is a fact. The best brunches have alcohol specials like unlimited or discounted breakfast cocktails. You will stop at nothing to get a table at this places. Then you will eat delicious yet overpriced breakfast foods and guzzle down mimosas like it is your last meal and you’re slated to be humanely executed by the state at 4pm (aka when brunch ends).

Anyway, all of this is to say that this city isn’t forever. New York isn’t exactly the best place to grow old. But if you ever get a chance to live here, do it.

 

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My Loathe List

Okay this might sound negative (because it is) but we all loathe things. It isn’t really complaining as much as it is stating a fact. Sometimes you just hate things — and that’s ok.

Right?

Right?!

Below is my comprehensive loathe list.

i love hating things

The sight and sound of people eating: This loathe is #1 on my list, by far. Sensitivity to food noises is actually a real condition. It is bonafide mental disorder and I have it bad.

So let’s say I am on the C train on my way to work and I hear a woman pop her gum somewhere on the train. I will find this woman, no matter where she is, and I will not be able to focus on anything but her and her wretched smacking lips and the horrendous popping noises emitting from her mouth. This will also send me into a silent rage and I will wish this woman bodily harm.

It is that serious.

Needless to say, meals with me are not the best. I am usually completely fine in restaurants because I can focus on other things, but meals at a table in a private home or intimate setting are very hard for me (i.e. I hate them). It’s weird because my own chewing doesn’t bother me. It is just the chewing, popping, smacking, slurping, food playing ways of others. It’s awful.

When men sit down and spread their legs wide open and take up all the room (aka ‘man sitting’):

man sitting.jpgYou guys. I can’t with this. ‘Man sitting’ really grinds my gears. Gents, I mean no offense but let me just say that whatever you’re toting in your nether regions is not so large that you can’t cross your darn legs and give us some room. Airing out your crotch for the world to see is not cool. We women have been taught to cross our legs and sit like civilized humans since we could walk. It is time for you to take our lead. Sit up straight, and cross your darn legs!

End rant.

When people say “Oh, I don’t care.” — but then they DO care.

This scenario plays out something like this:

Human one: What do you want for dinner?

Human two: Oh, I don’t care.

Human one: Okay. What about Mexican?

Human two: Hmmm, I am not really in the mood for Mexican. Can you pick something else?

*blind rage*

When people are more than 20 minutes late to one-on-one date at a restaurant

Is there anything worse than waiting at a restaurant by yourself until someone arrives to save you from your lonely misery? The saddest part is when the hostess is all like, “We can’t seat you until your entire party arrives, but you are welcome to have a drink at bar while you wait!”

Thanks, I will just drink alone at this restaurant bar that has two lousy stools. While I wait, alone, I’ll idly scroll through Instagram until I am looking at posts from five days ago and want to die. Oh yes, I’ll take another glass of Prosecco, thanks. I’ll just drink it here, alone.

 

What do you loathe?? Spill it. I know you hate things.

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maintenant.

spring.jpg

I haven’t done one of these in sooo long! Here’s what I’m up to.

 wearing: These red sweatpants from AE, an Old Navy tee, some socks that don’t match. Don’t judge. This is a judge-free zone, y’all.
 listening: Fancy by Iggy Azalea, which is ironic given the above response.
 reading: The Book Thief by Markus Zusak. It’s pretty good so far.
 watching: Season Two of House of Cards. I realize I am really late on this.
 doing: Not much today because I think I have a cold. Boo. I am trying to ignore it so it goes away.
 loving: This weather and the fact that the trees finally have leaves! Huzzah!!
 hating: The fact that I think I just used my last tea bag. I realize this is a First World Problem, but it is still a tragedy.
 wishing: Hmm, I am actually not wishing for anything. I am pretty content.
 wanting: This skirt, please.

What about you, lovelies?

p.s. for outfit details please for the above picture go here.

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Outfit Post Outtakes: Winter Edition

Winter has been going on for a solid five months. It is basically like I thought I moved to NYC, but instead I got lost and ended up in a large city in Alaska and no one has the heart to tell me I’m not in NYC.

I have been freezing my toosh off on side streets and rooftops since October to keep this blog chugging along. Let me tell you — I am so tired of seeing photos of myself in sweaters, tights, and black booties that I could just about lie down and die.

So let’s take a laugh break. Behold: Outfit Post Outtakes – Winter Edition

outtake 2You’ll notice a lot of these photos involve me in full-on battle mode with the wind. Here, I am trying to get a great photo of the wind artfully whipping my skirt around. It didn’t really work at first, so here I am wrestling the elements to get myself back into some type of order.

outtake 3Ah, here I am trying my very best to make a snow ball. I didn’t really participate in many outdoor sporting activities as a child (or ever in my life). Especially not those that involve snow. Warmth and comfort are my top priorities at all times. Snow is meant to be seen, not touched. Needless to say, I am still mastering the fine art of snow ball creation.

outtake 4You guys. ONE LEG!!! I ONLY HAVE ONE LEG! I actually never ended up putting this outfit on the blog. Mostly because I hated how this look photographed. I am not sure why I thought it was a good idea to tuck that shirt into my skirt — but that’s neither here nor there now. The other reason this outfit never went live is because I was so disturbed by this photo. O.N.E.L.E.G. Where is my other leg, though? This photo is so scary!!

outtake 6Sometimes the wind can whip your hair beautifully and make you the envy of all your friends. Other times wind causes your hair to poke you directly in the eye — not as cute.

IMG_0626This is what I actually look like everyday. My face has been frozen into a mask of sadness.

outtake 7And finally, I leave you with this.

Happy forever winter, everybody!

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It’s cold. Stay inside and read something.

You guys — this winter is endless. Soon I am going to be dressing like this on the blog. All I have wanted to do is stay inside and read. So read I have done, lovelies. Here are the top five books I’ve read this winter.top five books I read this winter

In no particular order:

  • A Lucky Child: I am a sucker for a Holocaust memoir. I find them so grounding and enlightening. This memoir is from the perspective of a child and it is so beautifully written. Read it.
  • Dark Places: You’ve read Gone Girl. It was great. You were shocked. Now it’s over and you want something with just as many sinister twists and turns. You should go read Dark Places now. In my opinion it is even better than Gone Girl. It is incredibly broad in scope and will stay with you for a while. Actually, you should read all of Gillian Flynn’s books. Sharp Objects is also great.
  • Let’s Explore Diabetes with Owls: David Sedaris is my favorite — but I will say he is at his best when he is speaking about his family. I was shamelessly laughing aloud on the train, y’all.  To note, you should be familiar with Sedaris’ writing style before you start this book. Holidays On Ice is a great Sedaris starter book.
  • World War Z: You are probably like, ‘wait, Clare, are you talking about that silly Brad Pitt movie?”. Well, sort of. I actually bought this book because I thought it would be an easy read I could plow through while I waiting for my next shipment of books from Amazon. Oh girl, I was so wrong. World War Z is some in-depth ish! It is nothing like the movie (I am actually confused about why they even called that Brad Pitt movie World War Z). Even if you aren’t a zombie fan, this book provides a powerful look at a world devastated by an uncontrollable plague. Note that this book starts of slow… like text book slow. But stick with it. Trust.
  • The Fault in our Stars: The tears. The tears. You guys, the tears! This book was so sad — but really, really good. A must read. But prepare yourself for the sadness of it all.
  • Honorable Mentions: Old New York, Sharp Objects, Sarah’s Key

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Five things you must know before you start a blog

five things you must know before you start a blog

Congrats! You want to start a blog! Blogging is, like, really fun. You will love it. You will sometimes hate it. You will feel super rewarded when all your hard work pays off.

Here are a few things you should know before you get started.

  1. If you want to start a fashion blog, perhaps reconsider that decision. Everyone has a style blog. Heck, even I am “just another girl with a narcissistic fashion blog” — and I have blogging for five years! That is like 5 BILLION years in Internet time! So unless you have something really amazing and unique to offer the fashion community, I would think of another topic. Even if it is DIY (I make my own clothes) fashion blogging or something. But your general, run-of-the-mill put-on-outfit-and-take-fancy-photo blog (i.e. what I do) is a little completely, and utterly over saturated.
  2. Blog about something that you can talk about forever in new, fresh ways. People always say, “blog about what you love”. I am almost 100% positive I have spouted off this drivel before, too. This advice isn’t necessarily very good. Take me for example, I would say my first love is sitting on my couch doing nothing. I can’t make a good blog about my extreme laziness. So I chose fashion because I also really, really, really like clothing and textures and the art of personal style. I also really like to be in front of the camera. It’s weird, I know, but I love taking a photo.
  3. You cannot blog alone. Okay, this may be an exaggeration — but for the most part I think every blogger needs a buddy. Let’s say you start a cooking blog because you are the best cook in the world. You go, gurl! But are you good at photography? Can you stage your ingredients and meals so they look great? Do you have a friend/husband/coworker who is super creative and can help you? You should ask that person to help you and pay them with doughnuts. I can say first hand that Clarabelle would be nothing without my husband’s help with all the pictures. That is not an exaggeration.
  4. Your blog needs to be really pretty. As I said in tip one, everyone has a blog. If you want people to read your blog, you need to set yourself apart. Whether it is a great blog design, the world’s most hilarious blog name, or really compelling content, your blog has to be visually arresting. If someone stumbles upon your blog, you want your content to be so good that they scroll back through your archives for more. That how you hook ‘em!
  5. You don’t have to blog. Blogging is effing hard. Coming up with topics; writing witty pros; the years of blood, sweat and tears to get a good readership. If you’re all like, “Ain’t nobody got time for that!” then don’t start a blog. If you want to showcase yourself or your talents on the Internet, start a Tumblr, or a Youtube channel, or use your Instagram page. Social media is constantly evolving. There was a time when people were all like, “Oh gurl, you HAVE to have a blog.” Well, those people are basically advice dinosaurs now because you don’t need a blog. Though I do recommend that you have some sort of online corner to showcase yourself- because you’re awesome.

The end.

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Sister, Sister

sistersFor as long as I can remember, if there is a fully-functioning camera lying around, you can bet your bottom dollar that my sister and I are doing extensive, and fabulous photoshoots. The shoots usually comprise of hundreds of photos, all more absurd than the last. Please see a sampling of the amazingness below.

sister lovesister love

Do you have any crazy rituals that you do with your siblings? Share them below, beauties!

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What are the three things you love most about your body?

three favorite things about your body

I was out at dinner with a few friends. I am not sure how the conversation steered in this direction, but my friend Cori suddenly blurted out, “If I had to pick my three favorite things about my body I would pick my hair, my eyes, and my umm ‘chest’.” (Note: she didn’t say chest but this is a family blog and I didn’t want to write boobs… oh, whoops.)

Anyway, like any girl she immediately back-pedaled and said something about how she shouldn’t have said that because it was conceited. Well, I thought it was the opposite of conceited. I thought it was GREAT!

As women, we are always picking out our flaws and putting ourselves down. But, if we really stop to truly looks at ourselves (and not just on the inside here, folks, I am talking the exterior, too), we would see that we are pretty hot chicks. And by “pretty hot” I mean completely gorgeous and amazingIt is important that we draw attention to, and celebrate the things we like most about our bodies.

So today, as we lead into 2014, I charge you, lovely readers, to pick out the three things you like most about your body and share them out loud, in the comments section below, as your FB status, at your year-end review — whatever. Just make sure someone sees or hears your three favorite things. There is no need to give a reason why they are your favorite things, you can just say them or list them in a word or two.

Celebrate yourself, girrrrl!

I’ll start. My three favorite things about myself are:

  1. My legs
  2. My skin
  3. My smile

What about you?

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