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Another Brick in the Wall

blue gingham, layered cardigan, a-line skirtThe sun came out in picturesque Harlem which made for bearable outfit post shoots. Hurray!

Also, you may notice that my new bangs are a bit shorter. They are because I decided to go big or go home. So I had my stylist cut them short and blunt.

However, short, blunt bangs require even more TLC than longer, swoopy bangs. For example, when I washed my hair after my stylist cut them, I didn’t realize that one has to style one’s bangs when they are wet.

Since I failed to do anything to my bangs when they were wet, when they dried they stuck out straight forward. They didn’t stick up or to side, they stuck straight forward and I looked like a full-on crazy person. Instead of simply re-wetting my bangs and starting again, I immediately began panicking and my husband thought my my Alfalfa-inspired bangs were just hilarious. Then, in my hour of need, the blow dryer and flat iron only made the situation worse. So I had to tie a scarf tightly around my head and sort of glue my bangs to my forehead and hope for the best. Luckily, the scarf worked, and in the morning all was well again with my bangs.

But now I know. Always style bangs when they are wet.

gingham, cardigan, and an aline skirt

layered blue gingham and an a-lineShoes: Brooks Brothers | Skirt: Asos also worn here | Cardigan: Forever 21 (old) | Shirt: J.Crew

Bangs: An Analysis

bangsLast weekend, I got me some bangs. I have had them for approximately five days and they have already changed my life — for worse and for better (like marriage!). Here’s why:

The Good:

The bangs, overall, are quite lovely. I look exactly like Zooey Deschanel with bangs. In fact, people have stopped me on the street and they are all like, “Omg,  are you Zooey Deschanel??” and I am all like, “Oh, hehehe yes no. It’s just my amazing bangs!”

So that is good.

The Bad:

I have prided myself in waking up (about) thirty minutes before I need to leave my apt to get to the office on time each morning. That thirty minutes is usually broken down as follows:

  • 7:31: After hitting the snooze button a million times I emerge groggily from my bed looking like a monster
  • 7:31- 7:34: Get dressed
  • 7:34-7:52: Complain to myself about how tired I am and how everything is the worst.
  • 7:52 – 7:57: Brush teeth
  • 7:57 – 8:09: Eat breakfast (Yes, I know I should brush my teeth after breakfast, but I have an unbreakable routine. The idea of breaking this delicate a.m. order is unthinkable.)
  • 8:09: Leave

You will notice that “do my hair” is not a line item. Because, during the week, I do not do my hair. I usually wake up, throw my hair into some bootleg version of the topknot and resume complaining about my tiredness.

With bangs, all of this has changed. I must now do my bangs. Which requires complex tools like a flat iron and heat protection spray. Now, I still don’t do the rest of my hair (that’s asking too much). But I must make sure I give my bangs the love and attention they need and deserve. This also means that my morning has been entirely thrown off and I have to cut down on my morning complaints by about five minutes.

So that’s not as good.

The end.